Excerpt from "Wesley" original half hour comedy

INT. RESTAURANT - DAY
The three sit around the table holding hands. Wesley and his father have their heads bowed.

MR. HOBART
... from Thy bounty through Christ
our Lord, Amen.

WESLEY
Amen.

MRS. HOBART
You think they serve one big matzoh
ball or lots of little balls?

MR. HOBART
Always with the balls, your mother.

WESLEY
So Mom...

MRS. HOBART
Oh, look what I have here for
Wesley. One plane ticket, roundtrip,
to Florida. To see your
grandparents. Who I don’t like.

WESLEY
We know Mom, it’s been five years.
I really think you should come
down, it’s their 60th wedding
anniversary for god sakes.

MR. HOBART
Wesley, please don’t take the
lord’s name in vane.

WESLEY
Sorry, Dad.

At the table behind them, two hot girls are making out.

MRS. HOBART
Look at those two girls necking.

MR. HOBART
That’s extremely exciting.

WESLEY
That’s extremely my girlfriend.

MRS. HOBART
(Yelling across restaurant)
Susie!
(to Wesley)
I knew she looked familiar.

WESLEY
Yeah Mom, we’ve been living
together for four years.

MRS. HOBART
I told you never to trust a girl
who wears a baseball cap.

WESLEY
She’s just experimenting.

MR. HOBART
Looks like it’s a success.

Wesley buries his head in his hands.